Photo Credit: Mark Sebastian via Compfight

When I moved to New York (over six years ago now) from Southern California, I experienced a significant cultural shift. I was moving from the laid back California beach culture to the hustle and bustle of New York city life. One of the first things that I noticed was that people here are far less likely to smile and make eye contact.

This difference was even more noticeable because I was also moving from working within hotels, where a culture of hospitality and service is ingrained, to working in a hotel company headquarters, where the culture of hospitality is submerged under the typical business corporate culture. In the hotel, you smile, make eye contact and give a warm greeting to anyone you pass by (be they customer, colleague or stranger.) In the business environment of HQ, people tend to be a bit more “nose to the grindstone” and some of these pleasantries are left by the wayside.

I’ve tried, for the most part, to maintain my habit of smiling and greeting people whenever possible. When I first arrived in New York, I was quite obnoxious about it. Women from my office would squeeze by me, nervously clutching their purses, as I bounded off the elevator with a cheery, “good morning!”

Photo Credit: Jes via Compfight

I think they eventually got used to me. And I eventually had some of my innate cheeriness dampened by the corporate etiquette of cubicle nation.

I’ve decided, however, to redouble my efforts after reading this article about the psychological sting of rejection by psychologist Todd Kashdan. He cited a recent research study by Kip Williams on fleeting pedestrian interactions. The researcher would walk down the street and as pedestrians passed by he would either:

1. Glance quickly at them.
2. Give a perfunctory nod and a smile, or
3. Look right past them as if they didn’t exist.

According to Kashdan, “when pedestrians didn’t get any acknowledgment from the stranger passing them, they reported a substantially lower sense of connection to other people.”

I think it’s important to note that he is not talking about being rejected by a friend, a colleague or an acquaintance. He is talking about a measurable impact on wellbeing from the glance (or lack thereof) of a complete and total stranger.

Photo Credit: Gustavo Gomes via Compfight

We all know that the current health trends aren’t headed in the right direction. But hear this out:

“The Center for Disease Control has long warned us that, should current trends persist, as many as 1 out of 3 Americans could be diabetic by 2050.”

These are the words of Dr. David Katz, Director of the Yale University Prevention Research Center. He then added that the associated costs would be unbearable, both in human and economic terms. The worst – or maybe the best news, depending on what we do about it – is that 90% of all these cases and costs are entirely preventable through proper lifestyle management.

This man purse isn’t a fashion statement…

My Dad has diabetes. In his case it’s Type 1, which isn’t associated with lifestyle and isn’t preventable. But let me tell you something: it’s not fun. Poor Papa has to inject himself with insulin 4 times a day, and before each injection comes a glucose reading. That means handling needles and picking himself 8 times per day. That means never leaving the house without his glucose reader and medicine (no, his man purse isn’t a fashion statement). He’s had to change his food habits. Handles very large prescription, medical and health insurance bills. Has a hard time identifying how much insulin he needs before a meal at a restaurant. Deals with additional hassles at the airport due to the equipment he caries with him.

And all this is nothing in comparison to the consequences of taking the wrong dosage of insulin. If he takes too little, his sugar level rises too high, making him feel irrationally irritable while damaging his internal plumbing. If he takes too much, his sugar level plunges, leaving him in a semi unconscious state during which he shakes like a leaf, doesn’t understand what is going on and feels very, very vulnerable.

Thank Goodness Papa is generally well-controlled, and these occurrences are rare for him. But even for people with his discipline, diabetes management isn’t a perfect science, and so spiking and plunging sugar levels are always a threat. Because it often goes uncontrolled, diabetes is one of the leading causes of vision loss, kidney failure, heart disease, sexual dysfunction, skin ulcers and even amputation.

A picture worth a thousand words

So tell me, isn’t it time we make it socially unacceptable to provide everyone with enough food to choke a horse at every Holiday party? Shouldn’t an evening spent watching TV solidly implanted in a recliner while munching on anything out of a bag become subpar compared to more active forms of leisure? Why is working 12-hour days still encouraged and applauded in an era when we realize it leads directly to serious illness because it leaves no time for a single wellness minute in the day?

Let’s take the first step towards a cultural shift right now, together. Whether you are celebrating the American Thanksgiving this week or not, take a few formal minutes to feel grateful for your body. Your hands, your arms, your legs, your heart – what would you do without them?!

And most importantly, let this feeling of gratitude inspire you to give back to this incredible machine through which you live every moment of every day.

My Rendition of Snoopy - not bad, hun?

Since quite a few of my family members are pretty decent painters, I thought painting was a great place for me to start. But because I know nothing about the topic, I decided to start with something easy: Snoopy, using paint-by-number.

This initial project fulfilled its goal perfectly. It allowed me to be creative, mix some colors together to create new ones, add some texture and really see Snoopy come alive with each brush stroke. In about 4 hours, I had created my little masterpiece and really enjoyed the process.

My husband also loved the painting. In his usual supportive tone, he said that he enjoyed it so much that he wanted to bring it to his office. To which I replied, “No, no. If you want to bring one of my paintings to your office, I’ll make something worthy of your office!”  There and then, I decided to paint Venice (also using paint by number).

My rendition of Venice - not quite as exciting as Snoopy...

The equipment required for this second project increased considerably. I went from 2 to 4 paint brushes, from 8 to 32 colors on my palette and from a 6X8 to a 16X20 canvas. The level of detail was also much elevated. And the progress, much slower. I couldn’t envision how all the colorful blots I was working on would add up.

Some 20 hours later, I started to lose interest in the project. I still pick up my brushes on occasion, but close to a year since I started Venice, it still doesn’t look like much. In fact, if I didn’t tell you that this photo to the left was Venice, you probably wouldn’t guess it!

When it comes to changing our health habits, a lot of us go about it the same way. We try to take on too much, too soon. We think we can go from couch potato and burger junkie to super athlete and herbivore in a week. And what happens after the initial motivation wears off? We return to our old habits. Only this time, we have reinforced the feeling that we can’t change.

The SaS Compass really works!

If your health habits are similar to my relationship with my Venice canvass, you could use a little help from the SaS Compass. Here’s the gist of it:

• Through the biochemical activity they produce, our sleep, food, mood and exercise habits are mutually reinforcing. In other words, if you start doing a little more of one, the others will naturally become a little easier as well.
• This means that rather than work on an area of weakness, you can start by working with a strength, something you are interested in and that will feel easier for you. For example, if your biggest challenge is your food habits, then start by working on your sleep and see if it makes better food choices a little easier to make. If sleep is what’s most difficult for you, try picking up the pace on exercise and see if it helps you fight insomnia.
• As we build new habits, further change becomes easier. This process will help you progress from baby steps to bigger challenges without too much strain.

If you’d like more information on how to use the SaS Compass, the introduction of Smarts and Stamina: The Busy Person’s Guide to Optimal Health and Performance will help you. Or contact us, and let’s discuss how we can help.

Here are the top 5 reasons why being a couch potato makes anyone more tired over the long run (and why you should stay as active as you can despite the pull of the couch!):

1- Sleep difficulties.  The relentless demands of modern life lead our bodies to produce excess cortisol, a stress hormone linked to insomnia. Excess cortisol comes at the expense of serotonin, a neurotransmitter that regulates sleep. For a better night’s sleep, you therefore need to reduce cortisol and increase serotonin. The best way to accomplish both simultaneously is through exercise. But if you prefer to hit the couch when you get home from work, you might be up watching longer than you’d like! Your out of balance biochemicals will retaliate and give you a (another?) sleepless night. When getting a good night’s sleep is difficult, feeling energetic the next day becomes one big challenge.

2- Frail muscles. When it comes to muscle mass and strength, the motto “use it or lose it” definitely applies. People who are injured and have a limb immobilized start losing muscle cells as quickly as 6 hours after immobilization. Since muscle is a powerful calorie-consumer, consuming between 50 to 75 times more calories than fat does, lower muscle mass easily leads to weight gain. More importantly, less muscle mass makes anything slightly physical require more effort. Imagine how difficult it is for someone who has excess weight and weak muscles to carry that weight around just to get out of the car, climb a flight of stairs, walk down the hallway, and lift a box of paper files before getting the day at work started? Whew! I’m tired just thinking about it!

3- Weak cardio-vascular performance.  The heart is a muscle. Like other muscles, it atrophies with lack of exertion. A weaker heart pumps a smaller volume of blood with each beat, requiring more beats to do the same work. Sedentary people therefore tend to have higher heart rates and lower oxygen consumption than active individuals. Since the body needs oxygen to transform nutrients into energy, with lower oxygenation comes lower energy. Along with higher heart rates come fatigue. It’s a lot of extra work for your heart!

4- Poor nutrition.  We’re already said in point 1 above that physical activity helps balance cortisol and serotonin. These two biochemicals have a lot to do with food consumption. Indeed, people with higher cortisol levels tend to look for quick feel-good boosts easily found in sugary and fatty foods. With low serotonin, cravings peak and are harder to control. In other words, inactivity combines two very important ingredients that can lead to overeating. In the short term, overeating will require a lot of your precious energy for digestive purposes. It will also bring your sugar levels on a roller-coaster ride that will leave you feeling depleted within the hour. Over the long run, overeating leads to weight gain, which increases fatigue by forcing you to spend more energy for everything you do.

5- Low morale.  This one is quite intuitive, but allow me explain it just the same. Through its impact on biochemicals, physical activity is known to reduce stress, depression, and anger. It simultaneously elevates mood, self-esteem, and energy levels. Comparatively speaking, sedentary people are therefore less likely to be emotionally healthy than active individuals. More and more research is showing that inactivity is likely to bring about feelings of emotional exhaustion, physical tiredness, and overall lousiness.

Isn’t it amazing how our sleep, food, mood and exercise habits are so intimately related? I just love that!

What does this all mean for people who feel too tired to exercise? Simple: understand that being sedentary makes you tired – not the other way around. Feeling better starts with being more active. If all you can bring yourself to do is some light stretching for 10 minutes, then try it out, and I’m persuaded you’ll realize that’s already enough to feel better.

Need extra motivation to get moving? Here’s how to set fitness goals that get results. Here’s one way I have found helps many truly enjoy their exercise. Here’s how I stay engaged when motivation runs low. And we offer 10 ways to increase your enthusiasm to exercise in our book - click here to check it out on Amazon.

This article first appeared in the Positive Psychology News Daily ©.

Couch Potatoe courtesy of Caitlinator
heartpump courtesy of ohhhbetty
Feeling Grouchy courtesy of joanna85555.

Think only big changes can bring big results?

I recently had an interesting conversation with a man who had just lost 30 pounds. Surprised to see him all thinned out and very curious about his strategy, I asked how he did it. In a very matter of fact tone, he said, “Simple. I stopped believing in all that small change nonsense. If all you take is small steps, all you’ll get is small results, and then you’ll get discouraged. To lose 30 pounds, you have to change your life in big ways.”

He then went on to describe how he started to get up an hour early to go to the gym and how he downloaded a calorie counter for his smartphone.

While his philosophy has merit, I’d like to differ for 2 main reasons.

First, for a lot of people, shrinking the magnitude of the change is essential to getting started. If I asked all of you dear readers to get up an hour earlier every weekday to go run on the treadmill, chances are nobody would do it and a bunch of you would unsubscribe from my list! But if I made a good case for a 10-min power walk in your neighborhood, I bet a substantial number would give it a shot. Then it’d be easier to get you to increase the time you spend walking or to add in a few running intervals.

Second, I believe that some small changes can have large impacts. I believe that you can change your life without changing your life.

For example, Dr. Herbert Benson at Harvard Medical School tells us that 10 minutes of meditation each day can keep the doctor away. Since the most conservative estimates report that over 60% of all doctor visits are related to stress, eliciting the body’s relaxation response through meditation can really go a long way. And just 10 minutes each day is sufficient. (Want to learn how to get started? See Do a Mini on p. 42 of our book.)

For another example, I wrote a few weeks ago about green smoothies. If you typically go for coffee and toast for breakfast, changing that old routine for something vastly more nutritious can dramatically change your energy levels. That’s another small change that keeps on giving.

Here’s one more small change for large impact: just eliminate soda from your life altogether. If you drink soda regularly, you probably aren’t aware of all the damage it causes on its way down. See the infographic below to get the full picture. It is eye-opening. Do you think that ridding your life of soda will be a serious challenge? Read Mary Lou’s story and strategy on p. 39 of our book.

If you have other small changes for large impact, we’d love to hear from you. Please share!  ;-)

Now imagine that a few of the musicians playing this tune are having an off day, not rendering the best possible version of your song. Could you still enjoy the song? I bet that to some degree, you could, mainly because you’d be able to know what it’s supposed to sound like.

OK. Now suppose that several musicians were out of sync. As a result, maybe the percussions are lagging behind, maybe the melody isn’t quite right, or maybe the harmonies aren’t so pleasant. In this case, what is typically your favorite piece of music probably wouldn’t sound the least appealing to you anymore.

Our lifestyles work just the same way. If you’ve been following this blog for a little while, you know that we are all about good sleep, mood, food and exercise habits. So if life were music…

• Sleep would be the maestro, because it coordinates a lot of the biochemical activity that affects the rest of our choices and behaviors
• Mood would be the melody – giving the tone for the day
• Food would be the harmonies – enhancing or completely modifying the tone of the melody
• Exercise would be the percussions – giving us energy and rhythm

If one of these groups of habits isn’t quite optimal, chances are you can “get away” with it – just like you could imagine your favorite song with a few musicians having an off day. But if 2 or more of these 4 groups of habits aren’t exactly healthy, then I bet you aren’t enjoying your life to the fullest – just like you wouldn’t enjoy your favorite song if many musicians were out of sync.

If that’s your case, here are two things I recommend:

• Work on your sleep habits. Just like a strong maestro can get all the musicians in line, sleep will give you the most bang for your buck in terms of getting abundant results with minimal effort. Sleep really is the gift that keeps on giving. And for those of you who have a hard time sleeping, our book contains a full section on sleep habits, giving you 10 strategies to try.
• Consider some wellness coaching - on your own or with a buddy. Coaching can help you set stimulating goals, identify where to start, and figure out how to progress.

If you’re done with feeling guilty for not doing what you know you should do, if everyday feels like a race to please every body but your own (!) or if you’re just tired of being tired, give the 2 suggestions above a serious thought. Life can be more harmonious, I promise!

That’s exactly what I’ll talk about next Tuesday, August 28th on Voice America. I’ve been a guest of this channel many times in the past, but I have to admit that I am particularly looking forward to this conversation, hosted by Louise Cohen, MSW, LCSW. Louise’s show focuses on turning obstacles into possibilities – something we can all benefit from. Click here to join us live at 3PM EST. For those of you who miss it, the recording will be available a few hours after the show, also on the same link.

I take my health habits very seriously, which makes things complicated in a society that has organized social eating around convenience and speed more than nutritional content. For example, I don’t go out for pizza. OK – I do eat some pizza on occasion, but only if it is whole grain dough, loaded with vegetables and includes no processed meat. I’m sure you already see how that can be limiting. (Note to restaurateurs: the health-conscious is a largely underserved market and therefore a great business opportunity!)

Which brings me to the following question: how would your restaurant choice and what you order be different if you were to go out for a bite with a health nut like me, versus a devoted fast food fan?

A growing body of research shows that our food, mood, and exercise habits are strongly influenced by the behavior of other people in our networks. I bet that our sleep habits are too, although as far as I know, there is little research on that subject. Our weight is thus strongly influenced by the habits of those around us.

And it goes a step further. Those in our network also form our reality. Without us realizing it, as we interact with them, read their Facebook updates and observe their choices, they help establish what we find normal and acceptable. So we’re quite right to say we’re having an obesity epidemic: obesity indeed spreads from one person to the next, just as other diseases do.

Now of course we each have our own share of responsibility for this picture. But we tend to know about that part. However we tend to neglect the influence of our social networks.

So what can we do about it?

I recommend asking those who pull you away from your health goals to help you stay in line. Have a conversation with that fast food fan, and tell him about your goals. Explain what these goals mean to you, then ask him to be the gate keeper of your choices when the two of you get together. Chances are he won’t be taking you for spinach and salmon salad just yet, but if the arm twisting for the extra beer and cheesy nacho bowl stops, the two of you have already made progress together.

This technique can also be very helpful to those of you who are health coaches. Ask your participants about their social influencers, and see if you can help them turn an enemy into an ally. It’ll be much easier for them to improve their habits if they’re not swimming against the current.

For more resources on this topic, check out the following:

• My earlier blog post on social contagion titled What Are You Catching From Your Network?
• This Fox News article titled Most Americans Ignore Truth about Obesity
• This 18-minute TED talk by Nicholas Christakis titled The Hidden Influence of Social Networks

To build a social network supportive of health habits, see Buddy Up! on page 30 or No! to Arm Twisters on page 142 of our book.

At the end of the evening, after everyone had shouted “Speech! Speech! Speech!” in unison for a full minute, the man finally got up to the microphone. I remember very little about his speech, other than how it ended: “To me, having a successful life means having success in life. All the rest is only fun and games.”

What??!!? That’s how he closes his speech on his 25th wedding anniversary – basically saying that nothing matters more than being successful? I was shocked.

No time for family time?

Fast forward to today, I now see that a lot of people think like this man, except that most don’t realize it and certainly won’t admit to it out loud. We feel we have to be “on” all the time, and miss out on family time to catch up with email. We’ve grown accustomed to sacrificing family meals so we can run to our various commitments. We feel guilty stepping away from our technology, and try to tweet and text between two sentences at breakfast.

But what if spending quality time with our loved ones can improve our work performance? Yes, you read right. Work-life balance isn’t code for lazy or weak; it actually contributes to strong performance at the office.

Secret of the Strong

Here’s how it works. Research by Seligman and Diener shows that the happiest people are those who spend the most time socializing. Next, authors Diener and Biswas-Diener explain that happier individuals do better at work – they are perceived as more helpful and productive, get better evaluation reviews and are promoted more often. Think about it for a moment. What employer wouldn’t want to have employers that are positive, energetic and eager to help?

So spending more time with our loved ones contributes to being happier, which in turn improves work performance?

Precisely! Gallup has studied work teams for nearly 40 years and their findings confirm the above chain-reaction. Their research demonstrates that the most productive team members are those who consider family time to be serious business. Rather than crawl to the couch to simultaneously use their TV and laptop after work, they invest their full energy in their loved ones, which refreshes and prepares them for the next push. Say Tom Rath and Barry Conchie: “Our evidence suggests that the most successful teams have members who are highly engaged in their work and highly satisfied with their personal lives.”

So next time your kids ask you to take them for a bike ride, you’ll have no excuse not to take them. Turns out that what’s best for them is also best for your boss or business!

Want more resources on this topic?

See my article Measuring What Matters on Psychology News Daily.

Or some of my favorite recent articles:

- Declare Your Independence from the “Busy Trap”, by Dan Bowling on the Talent Management blog.

- Poor Wellbeing is Killing Your Business, by Jennifer Robison in the Gallup Business Journal.

- Unhealthy, Stressed Employees Are Hurting Your Business, by Jennifer Robison in the Gallup Business Journal.

And to get started on the path to greater social wellbeing, or to help someone else on their way, see Leisure that Matters on p. 178 of our book.

My friend Christa Smedile, RD, LDN had been telling me for a long time how much she loves her morning green smoothie. The idea seemed intriguing. I mean, starting your day with 2 servings of fruits and 1 serving of greens sounded very appealing to the health nut in me. But come on! A green smoothie? It just didn’t sound sexy.

After hearing a few testimonials from her clients, who raved about increased energy, nicer skin, reduced need for caffeine, and fewer cravings throughout the day, I just had to give it a try. I guess that’s one of the bitter-sweet things about being a health coach. I feel driven to try every plausible strategy to really know how it feels. Also keeping in the best possible shape is part of the job description. So I have a little extra motivation to do things that I might otherwise find excuses not to do. ;-)

Green smoothies - yum!

So I decided to give it a try, and I kid you not, I was hooked in no time! Now every morning, I blend 2-3 different fruits together with water and organic kale, spinach, parsley, mint, and/or arugula. Sometimes I also add plain yogurt and chia or flax seeds as well. It’s as fast and easy as putting sliced bread in the toaster. But the results are quite different. More specifically, my stress level seems to have gone down, and I feel generally calmer. Not a big surprise, considering that the SaS Compass predicts that better habits in food will also benefit mood.

Equally interesting, my smoothie does make it easy to skip my morning java or black tea, and so I agree that it can be a great way for you to cut back on caffeine if that’s something you want to do. Last but not least, on days that I travel and don’t have access to my morning magic potion, my body really craves it. That’s one great craving to have!

My husband is also starting to be a serious convert. He left for work very early this morning, but had made his own before I got up. For those of you who would love to hear your kids asking “Mom, can I have more spinach, please?” perhaps green smoothies are the way to go.

If you’d like to venture on the green smoothie journey, summer is the perfect season for it. Start with about 80-85% fruit and 15-20% greens. The sweetness of the fruit will seduce your taste buds and get the habit going. Organic apples, pineapple, mangoes and bananas are the tastiest fruits to get started with. Over time, increase the proportion of greens until they reach about 40%. Make sure to rotate your greens to increase your variety of vitamins and to keep things interesting.

To all of you coaches trying to encourage clients to eat breakfast, not only would a green smoothie be more nutritious than toast with peanut butter and banana, but I bet your clients would feel better faster, too. Nudging them in that direction may make the breakfast habit easier to establish. It’s definitely worth a shot.

So give it a try, and let me know how it goes. I’d love to hear your feedback.

For more suggestions on how to include more veggies in your daily meals, see Be Sneaky on p. 134 of our book.